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LIFE ISSUES

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Last Updated (Wednesday, 11 February 2009 17:59) Written by Lekeisha Cotten Wednesday, 11 February 2009 00:00

LIFE ISSUES

HOW TO LOVE MY MATE
Knowing My Place in the Marriage

A great marriage doesn’t just happen. Having a ring and piece of paper doesn’t make a marriage. You can live in the same house and share the same bed with someone and not have the intimacy and commitment that constitute a real marriage. Having children doesn’t guarantee that the two “become one.”

I am convinced that faith in God alone is the foundation of every successful marriage. Why? Because just the act of agreeing that God has first place in every aspect of the marriage declares that the two of you are starting out on common ground. That, in itself, is an achievement! And there’s power in agreement, according to the Word of God. It sounds simplistic, but a married couple must be free to pray together, share the Word of God together, and be intimate with one another concerning God’s Word. Piece of My Heart

One of the keys to a strong marriage is that the two of you recognize and meet each other’s basic needs. God made us to complete—not to compete with—each another. Although it is a given that each individual may have unique needs and preferences, Dr. Willard Harley Jr. has identified five basic needs men expect their wives to fulfill and five basic needs women expect their husbands to meet:

For Men

  1. Sexual fulfillment
  2. Recreational companionship
  3. An attractive spouse
  4. Domestic support
  5. Admiration

For Women

  1. Affection
  2. Conversation
  3. Honesty and openness
  4. Financial support
  5. Family commitment

Recognize that God made your spouse with these needs and do everything in your power to provide for them. The dynamic keys to commitment and communication we share are designed to bring joy and fulfillment to your marriage. Remember, your wedding is an event, but your marriage is a lifetime achievement!

Genesis 2:18; Proverbs 31:10–12, 28; Amos 3:3; Ephesians 5:22–31; 1 Peter 3:1–8; Hebrews 13:4

 

Question & Answer Period

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Last Updated (Wednesday, 11 February 2009 18:12) Written by Lekeisha Cotten Wednesday, 11 February 2009 00:00

YOU'VE GOT QUESTONS...GOD'S GOT ANSWERS

Q:
What are the roles of the husband and wife in a family?
A:
Although male and female are equal in relationship to Christ, the Scriptures give specific roles to each in marriage. The husband is to assume headship/leadership in the home (1 Corinthians 11:3; Ephesians 5:23). This headship should not be dictatorial, but should be in accordance with the example of Christ leading the Church. “You husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by baptism and God's word” (Ephesians 5:25-26). Christ loved the Church (His people) with compassion, mercy, forgiveness, respect, and selflessness; in this same way husbands are to love their wives.

Wives are to submit to the authority of their husbands. “You wives will submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church; He gave His life tCup of Coffee with Foam in the Shape of a Hearto be her Savior. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives must submit to your husbands in everything” (Ephesians 5:22-24). Being submissive is not only the responsibility of women who have Christian husbands. We should never submit to our husbands if it requires disobeying God; the relationship we have with Him is the most important (Deuteronomy 6:5). But preaching, nagging, whining, and refusing to serve will only turn an unbelieving husband away from God more. Instead, showing her husband the love of Christ through godly behavior, serving him and loving him, will give him an excellent example of how Christ served and loved the church. If a Christian woman has an unbeliever for a husband, she must not leave him if he wants to stay with her. And if a Christian husband has an unbeliever for a wife, he must not leave her if she wants to stay with him. But if the unbelieving spouse wants to leave, it is okay to let them go (1 Corinthians 7:12-15).